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sacral warrior...notes from the field

When Puking Is A Sign You’re On The Right Track

AIL-Jimbo-SuzanneAt Darla LeDoux’s event in Vegas 2 weeks ago I saw Suzanne Evans speak. She’s a riot! And extremely successful. (Here’s a pic of Suzanne & Jimbo Marshall of Hell Yeah Studios on stage).

Suzanne shared that at one point in her business she invested several thousand dollars a month more than she was currently making in her business with a coach who was going to help her get where she wanted to go. She said she puked in the hot tub later that night when she realized what she had done.

And…it worked out. Obviously. Now she makes multiple 7-figures a year as a business and marketing coach with a great team of people.

I, too, have felt that sick feeling in my tummy (up high in my tummy-not low down in my gut) when I have made commitments that were such a stretch they seemed beyond ridiculous. And yet…I KNEW. I always knew deep in my being that it was the next right step for me.

We all “know” in different ways. I’ve shared here before how we are designed to listen to our intuition, to our own Inner Authority and what gets in the way (those little voices-damn them!). And yet, sometimes it’s hard to discern between what is fear and what is the Inner Voice. It’s actually one of the biggest questions I get from my clients- “How can I tell the difference?”

Here’s how I tell the difference:

  • Fear has a flighty fluttery feeling, it’s right around the solar plexus, or between the belly button and the sternum. It feels edgy. Slippery. Like the ground is falling away and there’s no place to land, ever.
  • Fear makes you want to puke sometimes. Or eat to keep the fear down.
  • Fear feels foggy.
  • Fear gets uber-rational. Logical. It “makes sense” (to other fearful people). It has elaborate and evasive stories to sidetrack you and others.
  • It has you feel detached, disembodied. You’ll probably feel a little like you’re on the ceiling instead of in your body.
  • Fear sounds like BS. (That’s b/c it is). You’ll know it’s fear for sure when everyone else around you can “see” the truth and you are staunchly defending yourself.
  • Fear says it has no money, time, that resources are scarce. Fear says “I can’t do that because____” (and anything you put in the blank most people who are playing small would nod and agree with you, while others who are stepping up and playing full out would think, “not in my world”).
  • Fear can be healthy-to be sure. But trusting your instincts and following your fear are two separate things. I teach people how they are uniquely designed to tell the difference in a Human Design reading.
  • Fear will have you say “yes” when it would be prudent to say “no.” Most often this happens when you are trying to look good, stay safe, or fit in.

Fear and Truth often go hand in hand-at least when you first get present to Truth.

It’s not that Truth itself is scary, it’s actually freeing. The fear comes when we are resistant to Truth (Universal Truth or personal truth) because our ego has it’s own agenda. When we courageously allow the resistance to be there, to acknowledge it, don’t try to fight it and consciously ask to be shown what is on the other side of fear- that’s when clarity comes. That’s when conviction comes too, because whatever it is that you believe in your heart and KNOW in your soul can be expressed in the world and create a new reality for yourself and others.

New experience = new belief/conviction.

I had a pukey evening myself at Align It Live. I purchased a VIP Day with Hell Yeah Studios to help me create a series of videos for you and others that express my truth and be of service in the way that my soul has been calling me to be for many years now, which I have been resisting because of fear.

I didn’t know how I would pay for it. I wasn’t crystal clear on the message I wanted to share. I have 2 small kids who will be home during the summer when I would need to travel across the country to shoot these videos. All perfectly valid & rational reasons to say no, right? And yet, DEEP in my gut, deep in my heart & soul I KNEW that saying yes to this would bring the means, it would bring the clarity, it would bring the resources and perfect timing so I can serve my purpose. That’s how God rolls.

You say yes and prepare to rock it-and God rolls the way before you.

Did I want to puke that night? Yes. Have I had moments where I doubted my decision, and told myself I’m crazy? You bet. Did I back-track? No way-because I have a clear knowing how to make decisions and trust myself-even when fear comes seeping into my thoughts and dreams. I’ll tell you what, there’s nothing like making a financial investment to help you get clear real quick. (And it helps that I have a coach to help me get clear and friends & colleagues who are playing full-out too who support my truth and want to help me express it and understand what it takes to do that.) Do you have either of those things or are you trying to piece it together yourself?

Making the commitment not just as a “someday I’m going to do that”, but actually putting some energy (read = money) behind my decision and signing up for that VIP day brought the clarity that I had been resisting for years (but am now ready to share). It brought the means. If I had said “no” that day, when shaking and wanting to puke on the outside but with that inner clarity on the inside, I wouldn’t have been saying no to the offer they were making from the stage, I would have been saying:

“No, God. I don’t believe you are supporting me. I don’t believe in myself or my ability to serve as you are calling me to serve. I don’t believe in the message in my heart & soul that won’t leave me alone-that I know comes from you.”

Think about that.

Personally, saying “no” to God makes me want to puke more than the fear does.

How about you?

From My Heart to Yours,


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