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sacral warrior...notes from the field

Do you treat your dreams like spiders?

SpiderI talk to a lot of people and most of them have at least an inkling, perhaps tucked away safely in their heart for years, of what they feel called to do – or would like to do if they knew they couldn’t fail. This inkling, or divine spark of an idea, keeps bubbling up from their heart & soul and then WHAM! it hits the mind and is squashed the way some people kill spiders just because they don’t like the looks of them.

“I don’t like spiders, period.” They say.


Your divine idea bubbles up again.

“I can’t do it.” You say.


Just. Like. That.

Or maybe you’re not a squasher. You’re more of a gatherer.

Gatherers see spiders and instead of freaking out, they calmly get a cup and piece of paper, gently capture the spider and put it outdoors where it can not disturb the peaceful home environment any longer.

Either way, the spider is a goner.

Reality check: it’s only a matter of time before we are all goners in this life as we know it.

Of course this article isn’t really about spiders, it’s about your dreams and ideas and passion. The question I have for you is this:

Which are you when it comes to your dreams?
Are you a squasher or a gatherer?

Still not sure?

Here are some clues:


  • Only allow a dream to percolate up when extremely relaxed and have let down their guard – as soon as they become aware of the idea or vision they find some logical, rational, and perfectly reasonable means of killing it or flushing it down the drain of awareness…
  • Get other people to kill dreams for them. In other words, they get a vision then without consciously being aware of it, they find all the people (and sources on the internet) in their life who are more than willing to flatten the dream – sometimes all it takes is a word or raised eyebrow. They get someone else to do the dirty work, so they don’t have to feel bad about being a dream-killer themselves.

Bottom line, squashers kill the dream as quickly as possible
lest it disrupt their idea of what’s possible and what’s safe.


  • See the dream, and ever so gently (sometimes with reverence and sometimes with disgust) collect that dream and toss it into a journal where it will have to fend for itself. “Get that thing out of my mind so I don’t have to wonder where it went when I’m sleeping and relaxed and vulnerable!”
  • Feel righteous and falsely secure in the knowledge that “at least I don’t kill them…I gently release them into the wild of the collective unconscious where they can’t affect me and my family” (then get upset and jealous when someone else starts caring for that idea they tossed aside 10 times).
  • Sometimes, just let it wander around their awareness without any direction “…at least it keeps me alert and intrigued about where it will show up next!” OR “not sure I really saw that right…I’ll wait until I see it again before I really do something with it.”

Bottom line, gatherers tend to try to keep the dream from being squashed
outright or even by taking action because they are afraid
they could or would screw it up.

I’ll be honest with you. I have treated my dreams much the way I treat spiders. I tend to gather them. Herd them. Try to keep them safe and “alive” by treating them gently and “protecting” them. I have comforted myself with the knowledge that even though they are in a journal somewhere, at least they are safe and contained and no one can squash them.

But isn’t that a form of squashing too?

It seems that squashers and gatherers are not so different after all. Both are righteous in their defenses and control of the situation. Both kill dreams because of fear.


How can you build tolerance for handling your dreams and big ideas, literally and figuratively, and start sharing them with the world?

From My Heart To Yours,



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