I was a right-brained girl in a left-brained world
and I did everything I could to protect myself.
I got too good at it.
I’ve always been empathic, intuitive, and able to “read” people, environments, and situations quickly and accurately.
My first job out of grad school was at the University of Washington where I conducted extensive diagnostic interviews as part of a research study with women who met criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder. I had to be accurate and able to discern between Borderline and Bipolar, which have similar features, but energetically, and at their essence, are quite different.
I didn’t know how to describe what I was doing back then, but now I understand that I was not just gathering data about the women through the interview process, but I was “reading” their energy. I was intuiting through a combination of my clinical awareness, but mostly through my inner awareness, what was “wrong” with the person, and what criteria they met for the various disorders we assessed in the study.
I could explain logically my diagnoses, once I had finished the assessment – but it was this sensitivity and empathy that allowed me to really determine the essence of the person before me – and honestly, while they all experienced severe behavioral & emotional problems, I could see their True (healed and whole) spirit underneath all that.
Over the years, and especially with the birth of my two kids, these abilities have become even stronger and more well-honed.
Eventually, I chose to leave the world traditional therapy with the labels and diagnoses. I had a hard time with the labels-to me they limit a person, and didn’t explain what was really going on.
I turned to energy healing and the field of Energy Psychology, and while I still use these techniques myself and teach some of my clients techniques, ultimately I had to walk away from that being the sole foundation of my work too, because I found that I was still focusing on what’s “wrong” with people, vs. figuring out what’s “right” about them.
Most people in the world are not in need of a diagnosis, or analysis,
they are in need of understanding their own unique energetic make-up.
People need to understand that we communicate and affect one another energetically first and foremost – and how this very basic fact is what creates dissonance in the mind, body, and spirit and therefore creates disharmony in our relationships.
I never would have described myself as “sensitive” growing up…
I had heard of Highly Sensitive People or HSP (as described in Dr. Elaine Aron’s work) but chose not to explore what characteristics these folks shared because that was NOT ME. I was sure of it. I equated sensitive with “vulnerable” and I had experienced enough of that in my life managing my intuitive abilities and empathetic sensitivity in a world that told me it wasn’t OK to be that way.
Then I wrote my book, Life Well Spoken: Free Your Inner Voice & Prosper, and after the whole thing was done I found myself at a crossroads.
I could either keep going as I had been: trying to parent and push and force my way through life from detached, arms-length way, which was highly protective, but not very fulfilling or I could live true to my Human Design, and own my intuitive, sensitive Genius: not just as a parent helping my kids live their Genius too, but in my other relationships, in my work…everywhere.
Of course, along with our Genius come our challenges. They are the flip-side, or the lower-vibrational state, of our Genius. These are the things that most of us label and analyze and try to heal – to no avail.
I realized I had been spending most of my life trying to “fix” these challenges, and making myself wrong for them, instead of simply being aware of them and choosing to show up in my Genius instead.
I, like most everyone else on this planet, hadn’t learned HOW to make that choice.
There really isn’t anything wrong with us at the core: we are all just managing energy and communicating energetically. Some of us are more sensitive to this than others.
Sometimes we are communicating at a higher vibrational state (or our Natural Genius), sometimes at a lower vibrational state (our design challenges).
As a highly sensitive person I had spent my whole life managing exposure, managing other people and their energy, and managing my environment so I could stay safe – because I was way too vulnerable and energetically sensitive. I didn’t have the skills or awareness of how to work WITH this sensitivity vs. trying to heal or fix it.
The more I tried to “fix” it, the worse it would seem to get.
Nowadays I have a different point of view: Everyone is sensitive & intuitive, it’s just that some folks are really good at ignoring it and keeping their head up their ass, and the rest of us are trying to deal with those who don’t want to deal! 😉
At some point, I had to change the conversation within myself. I had to learn to discern between the little voices in my head of fear and doubt, shame & guilt, criticism & judgment, and instead listen to my Inner Voice: The voice of my intuition, the voice of Love in my heart & soul.
As I’ve changed the conversation within me, my conversations everywhere else have changed as well.
I stopped trying to “fix” myself. I tapped into not only my strengths, but also my “weaknesses.” I continually practice owning and sharing my natural genius and all the challenges that come with it.
Today I choose to allow myself to be vulnerable. Receptive. I allow myself to surrender the need to get it all “right” and have all the answers, and interestingly enough – the answers come easier. My intuition has gotten stronger. My psychic gifts have become more pronounced. I’ve learned to trust myself.
I have stopped letting fear and “exposure management” stifle my Love,
creativity, and passion for life.
(Would you like to do that too?)
I truly believe that underneath all behavior “problems”, communication breakdowns, and faulty beliefs that create self-sabotage, there is a simple and elegant Truth: It’s all energy.
Nothing is “wrong” with us, (even if we are a Divine Mess at times!) Labels or diagnoses don’t begin to truly describe the energetic imbalance that people experience and what we need more than anything is a new conversation about energy, communication, and what it means to be an energetic being in a physical body doing things like parenting and partnering, and leading, and running a business (among other things!).
Today, I work mostly with entrepreneurs, many of them who have families of their own in addition to their business. I help them reconnect with their own True Harmonic Resonance (it’s the best way I can describe a person’s Soul Song or energy) and to understand the True Harmonic Resonance of their loved ones as well.
When we learn to manage our own energy and emotions we lead from a Sacred perspective (vs. the small scared egoic one).
Learning the language of subtle energy through Human Design and the language of the Soul is my passion. Helping others to learn this language and move from scared2sacred in their relationships and business is my gift.
Will you join me in this new dialogue? You can do that here…
From My Heart & Soul to Yours,